“Clownado” is the perfect storm of tornado, clown, and low-budget madness. A huge storm rolls in, bringing with it killer, sadistic clowns. It’s unclear whether the clowns come from the tornado or harness its power to kill helpless people…
The Unfuckening (Re-Watching “The Matrix”)
I’m in my mid(ish)-30’s. Trying to remember the plot of “The Matrix” was harder than my figuring out how to do a cat eye with an eyeliner back then (HOT TIP – it doesn’t work with a pencil eyeliner so don’t even try). What I CAN remember from my first go at watching this movie …
Benzoyl Peroxide Kills (Skin)
My spirits were high as I researched various internet websites for something more intense to help with the acneic nature of my skin. A spot treatment for under $10? It “zaps your zits” in a day? Sign thee up!
Hangovers, AM I RIGHT?
LADIES??? AND/OR GENTS??? OR WHATEVER YOU WANT TO BE REFERRED TO AS??? Hangover, AM I RIGHT? They suck the life right out of you. Sure, you may have had fun the night before. But you have to remember, you did this to yourself; you’re no longer 20 years old, you have adult responsibilities, and you …
The Worst Horror Movie Ever?
I watched “Night of Something Strange” the other night. I can confidently say it was terrible. Yes, it was low budget. Yes, the acting (?) was atrocious. Yes, the effects make you want to cry (for a multitude of reasons). But the zombie rape scenes were what really took the cake…
I’m Not “Living” for Avocado Toast (But it Lives for Me)
I love avocados. But, on toast, they rub me to wrong way. It’s like extreme health meets extreme convenience/dumpiness…
“Mandy” Review (A Nicolas Cage Romp)
Have you ever seen one element of a movie that just made the movie what it was? An actor, the dialogue, the music, maybe? In “Mandy”, as simple as it seems, that element was the lighting.
Fun with Bleach Burns
Please let this be a warning – bolster your bravado. You’re never as much of an expert in something as you think you are. You will end up living as a brassy blonde for a week.
“The House That Jack Built”: Meh with a Side of Ohh?
For all the hype that “The House That Jack Built” was getting online, this movie was surprisingly… so-so.
The Scariest Time of the Year (Not Halloween)
Halloween, the scariest time of the year. October 31st. Samhain. Rob Schneider’s birthday. So, overall, a wholly momentous day…